Things I've been noticing

1.) I only blog when there is something else I need to do, and don't want to do. In this case, there are many things I don't want to do and need to do, but that I just don't want to do.

So

I blog.

2.) My blogs used to be so much better.

Like a long time ago. Not even in the last year, or even two years.

I'm talking about 4 or so years ago.

Those were some angsty, badass blogs. To tell you the truth, I kind of miss that angstiness. Angst is the building block of teenage hood, and as I approach 20 I can't help but reminisce. And reminiscing is never good. In fact, it's bad.

Our trip down to de Portola didn't help either. Nostalgia is a drug. You feed it, but it's never satisfied.

I'd say my blogs are becoming more bland. Less flavor.

It doesn't go down like it used to.

Less fiber.

It's like eating candy and drinking pepsi.

No substance.

3.) I HATE APPLYING FOR JOBS.

JESUS. CHRIST.

MAKE THEM GO AWAY.

4.) I need a job.

5.) My life is a cruel paradox

6.) Oh I don't know. At this point I'm just trying to avoid getting my shit done.

Whatever.

No more lists. Lists are so five minutes ago.

Alright here's the lowdown:

I feel like I'm losing my mojo.

Bluntly put.

What does that mean? I don't know. I feel less concrete as a person compared to a couple months ago. Less cocksure...more skeptical. Why? I don't know. I've been thinking about what after college, and it's all so unplanned.

I guess this brings us back to #4.

Dude, this is one mad angsty post. I feel better, tell you the truth.